Trying not to watch Netflix
When life gets really hectic for me, the ideas about what I’d do with a little free time just flood on in. When I was wrapping things up in Australia - working, packing, selling, farewelling - I thought: I’m really going to make the most of my time when I arrive in Helsinki.
And how’s that going for you, Penny?
Well, I’ve really improved my coffee-making skills. I make the bed quite nicely, often including that nice fold in the top sheet that allows you to wiggle your feet more freely (they used to do this at The Hatton, but finding evidence of such a practice on the internet is very tough. I think it’s a bit of a housekeeper secret. This is the best I could do). I’ve drawn a poor representation of tree bark using pastels.
But you’ve had a month. Surely you’ve been doing something else!
And. I’ve watched quite a bit of TV. That’s the cold, hard, embarrassing truth. Nick’s still the one that usually cooks dinner when he gets home.
Why, Penny, WHY? Why aren’t you making better use of that glorious free time that the rest of the working world is wishing for?
I think it's similar to a creative block. I’m faced with a blank sheet of paper and I start something, it doesn’t feel right and I scrunch it up and reach for a new page. Or I draw a nice little picture in the bottom left corner, but there’s still all that space left. Or (and I’m going to break from the metaphor now, it has served its purpose), I do something that feels glorious and enjoyable, and then I remember that I am not contributing any income to the household and I feel guilty and go back to looking at the dismal range of English-only ads on the Unemployment Office job site (I’m seeing a lot of ads for software developers if that’s a job any of you are looking for). Or I call the Unemployment Office to check on the progress of my application and they inform me that they’ve lost it, and then I spend the day trying to emotionally and administratively face going back down that rabbit hole.
I think you’ll land on something, though. This is just new and strange after all those years of working day-after-day-after-day-after-day. You just need to get into a bit of a routine, a few weekly milestones, and a few projects on the go and it will start falling into place.
Thanks Voice In My Head. I think you’re right. I hope you’re right.